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[[ashlet]] [[ashley tan]]
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Monday, June 28, 2004

memories.

rather a queer thing, aren't they? some people would opt to erase all the painful memories and keep only the good ones, or long to erase all memories of a particular person or incident. is oblivion really bliss? perhaps for the person in that oblivion. but the people around such a person might feel the pity of it, the loss of experiences that make up a fufilling life, the loss of knowledge and feelings. while the person doesn't feel the loss, because it doesn't even exist. it's probably the same for death, isn't it. the person involved likely doesn't feel anything, while the people around them feel the pain and loss of the particular person. i wonder if we're indeed only truly grieving for ourselves. hm but back to memories. personally i'd like to retain them. the idea of not remembering anything about my life, or being cast into oblivion... just seems so bleak. of course i probably wouldn't be able to feel it if i had no thoughts or memory, but still. i think i prefer to be a fully functional human being with intact memories, painful or not. memories are rather queer. a buried memory from the past can just suddenly pounce up onto you when you're thinking of a completely unrelated subject. could be a nice pleasant memory to brighten up a day, or could be a painful memory to remind one of the bleakness in life. who knows... i guess the unpredictability of life is another thing to like sometimes. zest. the very epitome of life itself? perhaps, perhaps not. ohwell... shall mull no more.

7 weeks to prelims. i'm quite screwed i reckon. the first 4 weeks is mostly all gone due to cca commitments, so i guess that leaves me with 3 weeks. haha rather worried. seems like j2 is flying by so fast, it'll be over pretty damn soon. oh man. life is how short yet we don't make optimum use of it. haha i'm one to talk... i'm wasting my time now. basically just rotting away. egh i think i burned my tongue just now it feels funny egh -_- photohunt is fun. and i think i can't think in straight lines. more like strange squiggly ones. tristam shandy. haha.

:9:13 PM: :sugah~plum

Monday, June 21, 2004

Word(s) of the day: Bloody watermelons.

haha. the first day of term exams has just gone by in a whiz. was pretty fast, and i'm in rather high spirits though i have absolutely no reason to be and more reason not to be. does that make sense? shrug. haha. ohwell i suppose i'm rather jovial today because the two papers today are okay subjects. although math really was rather difficult (bloody watermelons and differential substitution qns) and lit popped up with a scene i didn't quite like, surprisingly its alright. i do like to do math sometimes... its quite... therapeutic? hm. ohwell... it didn't have to be that hard tho. yawn. and i wrote a relatively acceptable length for lit this time, realised the virtue of writing really fast and messily instead of slow and neatly. more efficient. ow. pimple on my scalp... damn painful! people think i'm lucky coz i have few and far between pimples on my face... but they pop up in the strangest places haha. well that's the thing with people... everyone thinks everyone else is lucky right? heh... well the grass always seem greener on the ottheeerr sidee. er well not always... but sometimes? hee. nvm a little high now... don't know why. anyway things seem to bug me a whole lot more when its night and i'm more susceptible to loneliness. but right now, its bright daylight and being alone in an empty house doesn't bug me... in fact its rather peaceful and relaxing. oh oops i wonder if my frozen stuff has over-defrosted... oh shucks. its nearly the end of JC2. so fast hm? hmmm. i think i'll really miss it... ohwell. haha i better get back to my defrosting thingies... oh and geog too of course. hm.

:2:11 PM: :sugah~plum

Monday, June 14, 2004

"They say life's what happens when you're busy making other plans. But sometimes in New York, life is what happens when you're waiting for a table." Carrie
"When men attempt bold gestures, generally it's considered romantic. When women do it, it's often considered desperate or psycho." Carrie
"Despite the fact that there are over eight million people on the island of Manhattan, there are times you still feel shipwrecked and alone. Times even the most resourceful survivor would feel the need to put a message in a bottle, or on an answering machine." Carrie
(gets hit in head with nerf ball) "I just realised... maybe it's maturity or the wisdom that comes with age, but the witch in Hansel and Gretel -- she's very misunderstood. I mean, the woman builds her dream house and these brats come along and start eating it." Miranda
"The reality was, the only thing that went down with any regularity on Charlotte's dates was a Gold American Express card." Carrie
"You can't make friends with a squirrel. Squirrels are just rats with cuter outfits." Carrie
[to her male intern] "The bad news is you're fired. The good news is now I can fuck you." Samantha
"And then I realised something, twenty-something girls are just fabulous, until you see one with the man who broke your heart." Carrie
"Wallis was right. The most important thing in life is your family. There are days you love them, and others you don't, but in the end they're the people you always come home to. Sometimes it's the family you're born into and sometimes it's the one you make for yourself." Carrie

that's why i love the show. and that's also how i can see why guys are not so much into it as girls are. haha. chick series. but its great... so damn funny and wise too. damn i should have been studying tonight. got my notes out, stared at it for one minute, and gave up.

His hello was the end of her endings
Her laugh was their first step down the aisle
His hand would be hers to hold forever
His forever was as simple as her smile
He said she was what was missing
She said instantly she knew
She was a question to be answered
And his answer was, "I do."


okay i admit it, i'm obsessed.

:12:35 AM: :sugah~plum

Saturday, June 12, 2004

i'm restless. and bored. and for some reason not in the mood to do anything nowadays. seriously NOT in the mood to study or write essays for one. i'm not in the 'studying spell', instead i'm stuck in the 'slacking spell'. don't really feel like doing -anything-. bleh. such a gray gray time. oh wait. there's something on tv now i think. but my dad's watching it. and suddenly i don't really feel like watching it either. i think the only thing i feel like doing now is curling up in front of the tv by myself in the dark watching sex and the city. or out somewhere. haven't gone clubbing in the while. kind of feel like going but opportunites are not particularly favourable. i'm damn bored. got nothing else to say. got nothing to do. and hm. why are people all so concerned about outward appearances? well damned if i knew why. sigh shall take retarded quizzes again.

YOU ARE MAE WEST!
Va-Va-Voom! You're inner Bombshell is Mae West.
You've definitly got a lot of wit, a lot of
smarts, and you know how to use people to your
advantage. Ever heard the phrase "doesn't
take any crap from anybody"? Well that's
you! Just like Mae you never want to settle
down, and can't imagine being with just one man
for the rest of your life. You don't care about
conventions and have no filter from your brain
to you mouth. Check out the movie "She
Done Him Wrong" to see your inner
bombshell in all her voluptuous glory!

Who is your inner bombshell?
brought to you by Quizilla


cough. i'm sure. help... i'm bored.

You are DORY!
What Finding Nemo Character are You?

brought to you by Quizilla

haha this is more likely.

:12:25 AM: :sugah~plum

Saturday, June 05, 2004

ow. two very irritating things happened to me today. no big deal, but its these small things which accumulate and irritate that spoil a day sometimes. ow. i got kicked in the forehead. ow. think that it would greatly aid in increasing my already very high level of stupidity and in discolouring my face as well. ow. bloody ice cube is freezing my brains. and in addition to that someone gets angry at me for hating a particular kind of food which he has known all along that i disliked greatly. generally it doesn't seem like its going to be a good day. although i haven't stopped hoping yet, so maybe it'll still be alright... or whatever. to top it all off, i'm getting sick. will stop grousing now. hmm you know if you put enough chili and sauce, or fry things enough, they actually taste passable. right. i'm so bored... need more online puzzles to solve. if you're bored, try the crimson and veridian room on my links, they're quite fun and rather difficult too d: sigh i really should stop slacking. but then, old habits die hard.

agh. my head.

:1:53 PM: :sugah~plum

Thursday, June 03, 2004

oh owww. i think i just got the hugest blue black by sitting on a seat handle -_- the movie seat handle thingies with the drink holders. ouch. hm. on the bright side i watched harry potter today. was sooo looking forward to it :) harry potter rocks. heehee. pretty good movie... but seemed like something was lacking tho. and remus lupin wasn't quite how i pictured him, but he's... alright i suppose. sirius black and dumbledore too. but some of the occurences/scenes were so real, it was like i was seeing them again. just like how i imagined. can't wait for the rest of the books/movies to come out. sigh. how wonderful. i think fantasy is positively great :) so... fun... interesting. haha. nvm. hm... really don't know how my holiday is going to turn out... one week is almost over and i haven't started studying at all. and i'm quite sure its gonna get busier. mostly i've just been sleeping or going out. slacking is well... slack though. quite difficult for me to study also... need company i think. but well. must try to do it on my own. hm. eventually. now i just have an on-off headache... and think i'll go slack somemore. maybe watch oc or something. or something.

:9:45 PM: :sugah~plum

Tuesday, June 01, 2004

ooh center stage. i just watched it... again. and think i'm gonna watch it... umm again. now. haha its GREAT. i need to get the songs... maybe i'll buy the soundtrack. wow. hm. right. oh well... went to watch the choir concert last night. it was pretty good hm, i'm rather surprised that i didn't fall asleep considering that's what i do at concerts. the music was very nice, and some of the songs are very interesting... the percussion song was very cool. i liked gaudete(gaulete?) too... hm. i think what i really like about choirs is the resonance created in the room. all the medley of voices combining to create this beautiful sort of sound. hmm. went to sit outside the esplanade again... i think its just so beautiful there. its windy, its got nice scenery and its right next to the river(bay?) and it was rather nice to see andrew again. haha and i like my fluffy skirt nods. i bought another skirt! yikes. ohwell... my internet seems to be kinda screwy and i can't search for center stage stuff... so think i'll go watch it... again!

:1:06 PM: :sugah~plum

:: morning found the breeze, a hundred miles away. ::