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Thursday, March 20, 2003


what the hell. the bloody computer is screwing up on me again. this is the bloody 3rd post i've lost since i tried to blog about this incident. sigh. this is so screwed up. one thing screws up and everything else has to add oil to the fire. anyway. i suppose it all boils down to a case of what you have you take for granted and what you can't have you want so badly. about milieu. i was so looking forward to it. like, ever since i bought the ticket. i just kept talking about it. and then i was enjoying myself, a lot, and was so disappointed when they had to interfere, and dampen not only mine, but a bit of everyone else's spirits as well. i mean if i have to get into trouble, then so be it. i don't want others to get into trouble because of me. yes, i'm that unfortunate incident that happened. and the thing i was so excited about and really wanted to go well was ruined. though its funny how some people don't even want to or enjoy it as much as i do, and will probably get a whole lot of chances to go instead. but life is never fair. sometimes its fair in my favour, sometimes its just not.

yes i know my blog is sounding all angsty and depressed and whiney, but heck, you can think that its full of crap, but don't tell me that. just don't read it if it bothers you. its my blog. and that's not it. even after this thing had to happen, i found out something else that made me very mad. incorrigible bastard. i think that's the only thing i can call him. i think i've been nice enough and thinking that, no he isn't that bad. rubbish. i'm not saying its not my fault at all.. ohhh it is all right. i'm quite bad myself. but he owed it to me to at least tell me before that. nevermind. i'm sure this is all not making sense to anyone as usual. except maybe one or two people who know. but does it matter? hell. i'm just not going to talk to him anymore. i always say i won't but i always end up doing it. not like it matters to him anyway, and i don't bloody care if it does. some friend he is. some friend i am. huh. whatever.


:12:32 PM: :sugah~plum

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