oh sigh. i'm supposed to be studying now. hmm i think i'm getting more efficient at typing, don't have to look at the keyboard anymore. tho i'm still not doing it the right way, only using like a total of 4 fingers, which is rather strange. but then again my keyboard is... ergonomically erm, different. was just thinking that it's such a nice day to swim, nice breeze and comfortably cold atmosphere... something that's probably quite rare in sunny singapore.
well was just reading through my erm, theory of production of costs notes (its so... cheem), and got quite traumatised by the back part of it, deciding to take a umm break. my attention span is incredibly short. waking up rather late again, so ended up starting work not all too early, and now a break? i'm never gonna get any studying done at this rate. i'm just totally not in the mood, and having trouble forcing myself to when i'm... not in the mood.
was thinking, what's the point? seriously, what's the point in all this studying? to pass/excel in our exams, which ultimately is supposed to bring us good results in the A level exams where we're supposed to continue into the university and mug our lives away once again. i seriously doubt this. and the ultimate aim of all these studying? to get a good job for a good life. ha ha. i guess this rationale doesn't appeal to me all that much, because a 'good job' is rather subjective. but then again, with higher education and all, you actually get to choose. choice is a rather important thing i guess, but then again when you have choices, you can't decide. isn't that the case?
i mean, thinking about the future, i can't really envision myself in any job, because i simply have no idea what i want to do in the first place. the course i'm taking now would help in deciding, because there are limited things i can study which would steer me in my ultimate career choice. but the idea of an office 9-5 job just scares me. more drudgery? isn't school enough? i think i rather admire people who break away from the system, or the conveyer belt that i feel i'm on now. of course everyone in each of their industry or position in society is important to maintain a cohesive and harmonious whole. but i guess there are some career options that are simply, rather different than others. some that might be considered 'inferior' or 'taboo' by some people. hey but at least these people aren't on the conveyer belt.
maybe, you say, the conveyer belt isn't such a bad place to be in the first place. oh really? well i guess everything is subjective. damn, reminds me of econs, postive and normative statements. sigh. life is such a strange phenomena. or maybe its just humans. i think we're rather fascinating creatures, in behaviour, thinking and physical mechanisms. but that's besides the point... as usual. i don't know 'bout you, but i wouldn't like to be immersed in continual drudgery. hopefully i can break away after i get some form of degree as a 'backup' as my parents would like it. well... but sometimes people just got no choice. but life ain't that bad... its probably just how we see it.
damn this post is pretty long. well who cares. in effect, my terms are screwed. perhaps in the big picture this probably isn't gonna matter, but well... currently i think its pretty... detrimental. because of the short but horrible effect it would result in... i shall get back to econs. and eventually to math and geog. ohwell... at least the blasting music is a comfort. i need more. if anyone knows of nice songs, tell me please. good luck with studying everyone... i think i've said that countless times on umm, more than one blog. soo... enough nagging and back to dah books.
:4:40 PM: :sugah~plum
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